Finally something seems to have gone right - I had to attend the tribunal hearing thingy yesterday and the good news is that i won the appeal. I was so worried about the possibility that i would be considered fit for work and would have to start doing the whole jobseekers routine. I can hardly go into the JBO at times when i have an appointment there never mind have to go through the process of proving i was applying for jobs that i am not well enough to actually do.
Don't get me wrong, i completely agree that the system has been exploited for years, and i would even go as far as to say that some of the changes that are being made are in the right general direction. It does however feel very much like everyone is being tarred with the one brush - that everyone is being treated as if they are the culprits guilty of benefit fraud. I know that there is a particular difficulty in assessments of people with mental health conditions as well, and i fully believe in the therapeutic aspect of work activity for mental health conditions, but there has to be a better way for the system to progress.
As i said, i actually won my appeal, and i got the zero points allocation i initially got changed to 21. The whole process though has been traumatic, has caused a deterioration in my mental health and is degrading to say the least. I have spent the whole day today in bed and have been extremely tearful. I feel as if i have been raped. I honestly can't think of any alternative way of describing this experience, and i certainly do not use the term lightly. I keep thinking i should be feeling good - i keep repeating over and over in my head that i WON the appeal - i should be celebrating, right? So why do i feel so dirty and powerless?
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